Ok It's Time for my . . . Annual Pre-Burning Man Rant and Predictions!!!
After 22+ years of attendance, I have watched this festival go from what was described by Wired Magazine in 1997 as, "what the internet would be like if it was happening in reality" to 2020 where, "What? In reality, this festival is happening on the internet" ?!? What a serious head fuck . . .
So strap in or strap on and get ready for disappointment . . . like virtually everything in this virtual world right now.
Here goes this year's Virtual Rant!
PREDICTIONS
The Virtual Burn is going the be everything you think it could be . . . an underwhelming and depressing reminder that you are not going the real Burning Man this year.
While it is still better than nothing, nothing is an extremely low bar. Get ready for a clusterfuck of 8 separately-produced interpretive video game dreamscapes, made by skilled teams of programmers eager to prove that their world-building technology will be able to make future financial investors a shitload of money.
Burning Man 2021 is a 50/50 chance at best. 2022 is not looking that great either. Between The Org burning cash on side projects, the FEDs wanting to crack down hard and the Bureau of Land Management clearly pretty fucking stoked that they did not have to deal with the whole shitshow this year, it's going to be an uphill battle for the festival to return.
Huge changes will need to be made.
Those few gluttons for punishment who do decide to go to the playa this week will be treated to Burning Man without the Burning Man Experience.
It will take all the hard work, organization and preparation for survival in the middle of a harsh desert environment for a week of Burning Man . . . just without the Burning Man.
If there is one silver lining of the event not happening this year, it's the fact that I don't have to pack up my dust covered Burning Man bullshit from last year, drive 19 hours, then have to smuggle drugs inside my ass to make it past the BLM rangers just go camping in one of the most fucking miserable and inhospitable places on earth.
Without Shirtcockers, Megaphones and Massive Thumping Soundsystems, it's just a bogus camping trip in bad weather with a shitload of cops.
This year we will NOT be seeing the usual post-Burn MASSSIVE FLOOD of social media posts from Burners who lost their nice $60 water bottle/container somewhere on the playa, often accompanied by a story of why this particular water container was of importance because it has a strap on it, followed by a brief description of unique camps stickers on it and a photo of said missing water bottle/container. In fact, while we are starting to think about cutting costs -- How about lost and found stops giving a fuck about your overpriced water bottle. You lost it, Becky . . . let it go. You spent 20 times More Money on Cocaine for the week than the price of your fucking stoopid-Smart-Bottle-container.
THE VIRTUAL BURN
This year’s Virtual Burn brings about more questions than it does answers.
How will Shirtcockers express their hatred of pants without a Burning Man? In a virtual world, they become no different than unsolicited dick pics.
How will Artcar Owners be able to swing their metaphorical dicks around without their Artcars booming Deep House music to show the world their girth. Sure, you can build one in the Minecraft world for this years Burn . . .But lets face it: No one is gonna be like "Who did that 3D CAD drawing, I totally wanna fuck them!"
What will all the Assholes with Megaphones do without Burners to heckle?
Without handheld amplified audio devices and wide-open spaces, they become no different than Internet Trolls.
How will Hippies on a Vision Quest be able find their spirit animal online? Without a guided shamanic ritual and Temple to burn, they become no different than someone playing Animal Crossing.
If there is no moop or trash to clean up in a virtual Burning Man how can Moop-shamers be able to prove to campmates and others that they are better at "doing Burning Man " than everyone else? In a virtual world they become no different than a Sarah McLaughlin Green Peace commercial.
How will Dooshbonnets and Dooshbags be able to gain followers on Instagram without the giant Robot Heart to climb?
How can they show the world that they not only have braved the pool of Piranhas chomping for position for line, negotiated past the all-seeing and all-knowing doorgirl with a clipboard, proving that they have climbed both the social and physical ladder to reach the top of the Robot Heart, so that they may look down upon the lowly dancefloor with both spite and pity for the unwashed masses who where not able achieve such greatness.
Without this accomplishment, they become no different than average Twitter users vying for Celebrity attention.
How will Burning Man DJs be able to disappoint us with poorly executed timing and bullshit Michael Jackson remixes? Without huge Soundsystems to bang out the worst in modern electronic music, DJs just become . . . The SAME TERRIBLE DJs just now on Twitch! #playatech #Djstreaming #Djsofburningman
Although each Virtual World must have been an amazing feat of programming in its scope and size, it kinda feels like a huge project that was done in a short amount of time. None of the Eight Worlds, in any way, reflect the typical Burning Man experience.
However, there are a few non-official super realistic Burning Man simulators out there.
By far the most realistic experience has to be the "Getting Out More This Year" Simulator.
The player is welcomed to a rich and tangible 3D World of Chris's DopeAss 70s RV, which is camped way out on 4:30 and H, where your avatar can spend all day and all night doing fun things like Ketamine, or other colorful interactive game play such as snorting Ketamine, and even interact with the virtual Chris’s chat box and watch his avatar do Ketamine.
Other game play options include doing Ketamine, talking about doing Ketamine and also doing Ketamine.
The more days and nights spent doing Ketamine, the higher the score! If you want to experience what a typical Burner really does the whole week, than this one is for you!!
Then we have: "Let's Go Party" . . . the online multi-player game where the objective is to get your group of more than 6 Burners to try and leave camp, and all go out to party together.
I did not have much fun playing. I was never able to leave the front of camp. 14 hours of game play later, Brenda still needs to go back for chapstick and Ricky can’t find his bag of blow. Then once Brenda arrives ready, Kaleporia is cold and needs a scarf. Darkwad David is going back to get some blinky lights for the 3rd time. Now Timmy can't find his cigarettes . . . Fuck.
“ManBun Boyfriend”. In this first person POV game, you (the ManBun) has little to no control within the game, with only a single "Ok, Sure" button to navigate within the world. The game play opens as the player is dragged out of bed at 6 AM by the onscreen girlfriend who takes you (the ManBun) on an treacherous journey of sunrise yoga classes, self help lectures, think and grow rich seminars, yoga, positive affirmation workshops, mindful guided mediations, yoga, healing arts ceremonies, wellness and well-being talks, yoga, vegan lifestyle in the new age conferences, yoga, mindful-and-wellness-group-chat and also yoga.
Extra points if you can score a selfie in front of the Giant BELIEVE letters!!
After 8 grueling hours of game play, it simply flashes a screen where girlfriend says "I'm Tired", and the “ManBun Boyfriend” simulator then restarts game play to opening sequence.
“DJs Girlfriend”. This simulation offers a similar experience to “ManBun Boyfriend”. However, in this first person POV game, you (the DJs Girlfriend) is invited to Follow "Dj GlockTrigger" on a dubstep-and-monster-energy-drink-filled adventure as you (the DJs Girlfriend) is rushed from empty dancefloor to empty dancefloor, while picking up extra points if you can find him a "line of blow". After 12 hours of game play the screen flashes "Hey babe I'm gonna go drink with the boyies" and game play is reset.
THE RANT
I am not that great at finance. Obviously. I’ve been to Burning Man 22 times. That should tell you enough about my poor financial / life choices.
But even this burnout Burner can do the math and see that the Burning Man Org is in financial trouble.
Burning Man may need to sell out to save itself. It would not be the first time..
Burning Man "sold out" to the PsyTrance community in 1997. To help ticket sales, the Bay Area was flooded with seriously lame underproduced Rave flyers. Or maybe Dr. Dre can toss in a few million to keep The Org afloat once again.
Or hey why don't we start tickling Elon Musk's balls again, and see if we can start choking on his shaft in return for some sweet corporate demon semen sponsorship.
The Org has already gone pinky finger deep with him. Like when Tesla brought out a full-on Electric Car Expo. That's right, in 2007, at Burning Man, right at fucking Esplanade & 9:00, they had what can only be described as an “anonymous car dealership” from “the green future”, complete with lengthy-worded displays filled with lofty promises of clean energy, infused with subtle corporate propaganda.
In the center of the exhibit sat a life-size solid black plastic model Tesla car.
As well as someone on guard 24/7 to make sure no one tagged or fucked with the stoopid thing. I personally got chased out for drawing a dick in the DUST on the window! All I know is they should have burnt it down or blew it up by the end of the week, but that lame ass mother fucker was still there on Sunday when I journeyed back to draw a dick on it again -- this time with a PAINT PEN. After executing a perfect fat-sacked-choad-headed-donger on the hood, I was once again chased out by rangers, this time with pitchforks screaming bloody murder for my head!!
Fuck you, Ranger Doug! You will never be able to prove that was Me!!!
So Look, it's not the first time The Org spread its asscheeks for a little bit of corporate dick on the side. They also bent over back in 2013 and let Mark Fucking Zuckerberg bring a Giant Golden 'LIKE' sculpture out there. I just hope they did the right thing by the end of week and it was killed with fire.
SO we know The Org is corporateBiCurious. Time to snuggle up, get out of the corporate cocksucking closet and cash in on the fact that this place sold out a long time ago.
Start flirting with attractive corporate entities like Mark Z, the Google Boys, Elon, Tommy Boy from Myspace, or maybe even P-Diddy to toss in some cash to get this fucking party started again!
Yo, Elon! How can we have Burning Man on Mars in 2050 as planned, if we can’t keep it going on Earth for the next 30 years?
At this point, The Org can spread their legs in the backseat of that Tesla and change next years theme to Space-X. I could give a FUCK!!!!! As long as we can keep Old Naked Dudes On Bikes rolling free.
Let some of these cocksucking limpdick corporations like Doritos -- who have already profited from using our Artcars and culture in a their fabricated commercials -- actually fucking pay us money and we will let them shoot a real commercial out there. Have fun pixelating the nipples out of the background actors. I COULD GIVE A FUCK as long as Shirtcockers have a natural habitat to dongslap and roam free. Let Brazzers.com build the Temple! I sincerely really don't care what they do . . . as long as Assholes with Megaphones have wide open spaces to heckle Burners in the Black Rock Desert like GOD intended.
BACK TO BASICS : THE FESTIVAL WILL NEED TO RESEST
Maybe The Org will stop fisting themselves in the burnhole with all the Cultural-Direction-Bullshit and get down to brass tax here.
They have spent years trying to market the festival as a family-friendly-non-offensive-all-inclusive-experience for the suburban upperclass while still catering to the super elite.
We need The Org to provide the DPW and Tickets . . .
Not for Cultural Direction, or Large Scale Art Funding Circle Jerks, Abstract Charity Causes, International Involvement, or any of the Meaningless Feel-Good Propaganda tools they use to control the image of the festival!
The number one focus from here on out needs to be the festival itself taking place once again in Black Rock City!
This defacto-defunding of The Org is a blessing. Look, when it comes down to it, it's not about the lame fucking themes each year. It's about the Burners who come and contribute to the festival that makes it special.
It’s not about overpriced art grants, or Rich-Dick Theme Camp placement priorities. It about the shitty unofficial un-themed camp at 7:00 and J blaring Discotrance music on a distorted soundsystem while giving away room temperature margaritas!
I could give a fuck about all of the elaborate expensive blinking bullshit! Cuts cost! Make the Burning Man effigy from toothpicks for all I give a fuck. None of that shit really matters. The spirit of Burning Man is in the person giving away ice cream from a cooler out in deep playa on a hot afternoon.
The soul of the festival is in Old Naked Dudes on a Bikes rolling free across the desert!
The heart of the festival is the Nightmare Hippy Chick on Acid rolling around in the dust, screaming about her spirit vegetable.
Believe me if The Org had its way, Burning Man would be nothing but Transformational Mediation Seminars, Yoga Classes, Ultra Overpriced Sculptures, and TED talks about how to get rich quick selling a new type of investment portfolio.
I am perfectly happy with the crappy bars and half-assed theme camps that are there just to have a good time. We don't need The Org's unique brand of new age capital-elitism bullshit.
They have clearly dropped the ball on the Cultural Direction for years, and the less they steer the ship, the better, cuz we have already washed up on the rocks.
BULLSHIT CLICKBAIT
“Top 10 Burning Man Pictures You Must See To Believe!”
And once clicked, sure enough it’s nothing but a bunch of super basic-ass photos of some super-hot-Coachella-swinger-couple at sunset in front of the most gentrified “OMG I need to get a selfie in front that to show my followers on Instagram” artwork on the playa.
You already know exactly where these fucksticks took the stoopid photo is front of, OF fucking course it's in front of the BELIEVE letters. It’s Basically the "live, laugh, love" of playa art.
Really, I won't believe this ?!
What I won't believe is that their relationship is going to last beyond next week . . . cuz there’s a 90% chance they are gonna join the wrong gangbang at the Orgy Dome and suddenly someone is not happy about the amount of buttfucking the other one received.
Thanks Business Insider Magazine for exposing the public to the wild and crazy world that is Burning Man. Now every fucking Chad and Becky from Wall Street is trying to come here to get laid. "Bro if I was there I would bang so many Hot Chicks on top of those letters" . . . "OMG I LOVE those Letters!! We are SOOO going to Burning Man to meet our future husbands <3."
How about 10 REAL photos you won’t believe?
Too bad the cameras weren’t there to snap a picture of the guy who took a shower with a fat chick and midget porn star!
It’s a shame no one from the Daily Mail UK was there to catch video of the guy who was tripping his nuts off and could not figure out how to unlock the door of the porta-potty -- escaping only by busting through the plastic roof and climbing out the top several hours later.
Or how about that chick at the meditation camp that was able to summon a higher power of consciousness and transcended the spacetime continuum for a short/infinite amount of time!
Where the fuck was BoredPanda.com to catch a photo of the person who was hit with a rubber dildo when it was carelessly thrown from the top of the Space Pirate ship into the Mayan Warrior crowd.
Now That’s some real stuff that happens out there that I would be happy to clickbait on!
THERE WILL BE SOME CHANGES MADE
The Large Scale Art:
Instead of funding massive installations that end up being resold to casinos on the Las Vegas strip, why not treat them like large Rich-Dick Theme Camps -- give the Installation Artists 200 DGS Tickets, and in return, these assholes will be happy to spend shitloads of money on blinky light towers or whatever, just so they can lock in those sweet sweet reserved tickets for themselves and their friends.
The Tone:
The Utopian Blinkylight Dreamscape has been cool for the past 16 years . . . Buuuut . . . it has gradually fallen out of touch with the world around us.
For far too long, The Org has ignored camps or underfunded art that could be perceived as dark or controversial in any way, shape or form.
Yet again, another example of their Cultural Direction Tactics to market Burning Man as a blinky-light-mickey-mouse-Epcot-Center for wealthy-business-insiders-and-celebrities featuring a safespace-family-oriented-wholesome-body-wellness-green-living-environment for social-media-influencer-photo-shoots.
Burning Man has NEVER been a Safe place!
In 1998, I witnessed a beheading by guillotine at the Opera Performance that was so realistic I spent the next 5 hours (still frying balls on acid!) convinced that Billy Graham was right about this place being a Satanic death cult that would bring about the end of the world.
IT WAS DISTURBING!
If the Barbie Death Camp incident at last years’ Burn taught us anything, it is that there clearly need to be risky and controversial works of art at the festival.
We can't be having pussy-footed Australians throwing temper tantrums like little punk bitches CUZ they don't like the way someone put Barbie Dolls inside an oven!
Why did that do-good-koala-humping-limpdick-ASS-licker think it was OK? Well . . .The Org has shoved the narrative that Burning Man is strictly "good vibes only" down our fucking throats so deep that we finally gagged from it.
Why the fuck was that guy even there? Well, he clicked on the Business Insiders’ “Top Ten Burning Man Photos You Must See To BELIEVE” and thought it was gonna be nothing but butterfly sculptures and Instagram Models in front of giant letters.
No Kids:
Yep. Sorry Minecraft Burners, but you are gonna have to wait until you are 21 to come to this party!
Renegotiating the insurance policy as an over-21 festival will save The Org millions and millions of dollars.
Out of 80,000 people, less than .05% are under 21 . . .yet we have to check IDs at every fucking bar !?
Every year the gate gets closed down and no one can filter in or out because someone asshole can't find their kid. This should be a HUGE red flag !
Law Enforcement uses the fact that minors are allowed at the event as justification to engage in predatory conduct such as undercover stings, camp raids and random tickets for unsuspecting bartenders who forget to check IDs.
Also I am not comfortable with the legal grey area the Shirtcocking and Titbouncing in the presence of minors creates.
And if it ever comes down to nudity versus allowing kids, I am sorry but we can't sacrifice the heart of this festival on account of the fact that you don't want to get a fucking babysitter for the week.
Your kids could give a flying-donald-duck-fuck about Burning Man! You and I both know goddamn well that given the opportunity they would rather play video games for the week at grandma's house then have to listen to Mom and Dad fight at Burning Man all week about who got buttfucked by whom at the Orgy Dome. . .
LEAVE THEM AT HOME!!!!!!
So the rest of us can be free to fuck, drink, smoke and wave our goddamn dicks and clits around whereever we see fit!!!
The Temple:
In the early days of the David Best Temples, they were constructed from the leftover hollows of wooden dinosaur jigsaw puzzle pieces.
It was low cost, recycled and pretty fucking cool!
Last year’s Temple was overdesigned, structurally unsound, and made from rare rustic-oak hardwood and redwood trees imported from China.
Let’s cut costs and just do what those guys from Belgium did in 2005. It's a Very Simple Plan. We get a shitload of old 2x4 boards and fucking Wing It! The Belgium Waffle House would have made a perfectly good Temple.
Garbage Dumpsters:
Yep, that's right. In the future we will have dumpsters at Burning Man! All the Survivalist and Moop-shaming Burners say it will destroy the festival. Guess what, Burn Nut? It's already common practice for larger theme camps to rent dumpsters that are emptied at the end of the week!! It's been going on for YEARS! So what?
Theme Camps will now have to pay a dumpster fee and there will be strict rules around any public dumpsters. Believe me The Org will provide the minimum amount possible to accommodate the BLM. It won't be nearly enough dumpsters for everyone to just toss all their trash, recycling and extra bikes into.
Don't worry, Radical Self-Reliant Survivalist Burnertypes, other people will still have to suffer packing up and dealing with their own trash on the ride home. Moop-shamers rejoice! You will definitely still be able to shame people for mooping and not cleaning up, if not even more so now. I don't see why we can't be Radically Self-Reliant by having dumpsters on site. We will still Leave No Trace, while leaving one less thing for surrounding communities to bitch about.
Build the Wall !!!
Ya fuck it! Build the Wall. So what? Honestly, it will be more aesthetically pleasing than that fucking orange fence. And if that is what the Feds want, that's cool with me -- as long as The Org gets to choose who does Security!
Thank fucking god we are not doing Burning Man this year.
With the world on fire all around us, it seems a bit tone-def to hold a giant rave utopia party!
I, for one, will be enjoying the week indoors under air-conditioning and rolling around in the heaps of cash I am saving by not going. I’m not attending a single workshop to expand my consciousness, not giving a single gift to anyone, and not being radical or self-reliant in any way.
Fuck your Virtual Burn.
I am Zapper Jones. I will see you in the Dust again . . . Sometime Somewhere in the Future!

[Effortpost 6 of 15] Donald Trump's History of Bigotry

Based on the rhetoric of the 2016 Trump campaign, numerous racially charged tweets, anti-immigrant policies, and even the lack of diversity within his own staff, it doesn't seem surprising to say that Donald Trump is a bigot.
Bear in mind that this will be quite long. It'll be broken down into three categories: pre-presidency, 2016 candidacy, and presidency. I should note that this post won't contain everything, so at the end I'll add other compilations of his remarks towards different groups.

Pre-Presidency

The 1970s:

1973 - Under the Nixon administration, the Dept. of Justice sued Trump Management Co. for violating the Fair Housing Act; evidence showed that Trump had refused to rent to black tenants and lied to black applicants about whether apartments were available. Trump fought the suit, claiming the federal government was "forcing him to rent to welfare recipients" and that if he gave in, a "massive fleeing from the city of not only our tenants, but communities as a whole" would occur.
- In 1975, an agreement was signed stating Trump would not discriminate against renters of color. (Of course, Trump never admitted to being guilty.)
- [Original headline for this story.]
1978 - The federal government filed a motion for supplemental relief, charging the Trump company because of failure to comply with the 1975 agreement. Roy M. Cohn, a lawyer for the company, stated “The Trumps performed so perfectly under two‐year consent decree, which expired last June, that the Government made no move to extend it. Today's motion is nothing more than a rehash of complaints by a couple of planted malcontents, not'. one of which has the slightest merit.” It is unclear what happened with the government's request for further action.

The 1980s

“When Donald and Ivana came to the casino, the bosses would order all the black people off the floor,” said Kip Brown, former employee at Trump's Castle in Atlantic City, NJ. “It was the eighties, I was a teenager, but I remember it: They put us all in the back.”
1988 - Donald Trump was invited to Lehigh University to give a commencement speech. He spent much of his time attacking countries such as Japan of "stripping the United States of economic dignity."
1989 - The Central Park Five were accused of attacking and raping a jogger in New York City. Donald Trump took charge in this case and ran an ad in the papers demanding, “BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY. BRING BACK OUR POLICE!” Trump claims that this had nothing to do with race; rather, he has been a big believer of the death penalty for horrendous crime.

The 1990s

1991 - John O'Donnell, former president of Trump Plaza Hotel & Casino, quoted Trump's criticism of a black accountant:“Black guys counting my money! I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are short guys that wear yarmulkes every day. …I think that the guy is lazy. And it’s probably not his fault, because laziness is a trait in blacks. It really is, I believe that. It’s not anything they can control.”
- In a 1997 Playboy interview, Trump said that “the stuff O’Donnell wrote about me is probably true.”
1992 - In order to accommodate a gambler's prejudices, the Trump Plaza Hotel and Casino transferred black and women dealers off the tables. Trump Plaza was ordered to pay a $200,000 fine.
1993 - During a congressional testimony, Donald Trump said that some Native American reservations operating casinos should not be allowed because "they don't look like Indians to me."

The 2000s

2000 - Trump secretly ran attack ads against the St. Regis Mohawk tribe, suggesting that they had a “record of criminal activity [that] is well documented.” He saw the tribe - and their proposed casino - as a threat to his casinos in Atlantic City. The ad campaign warned that Indian casinos would bring evils such as "increased crime, broken families, bankruptcies and, in the case of the Mohawks, violence.”
- The ads came from a grassroots anti-gambling group called the New York Institute for Law and Society created and run by longtime Trump friend and consultant, Roger Stone.
- Here are some of the ads used by Trump and Roger Stone. ('Roger - this could be good!")
2004 - Trump fired Kevin Allen, a black contestant on season two of The Apprentice, for being overeducated. “You’re an unbelievably talented guy in terms of education, and you haven’t done anything,” Trump said on the show. “At some point you have to say ‘That’s enough.'”
2005 - Because Trump wasn't particularly happy with the latest season of The Apprentice, he pitched "an idea that is fairly controversial — creating a team of successful African Americans versus a team of successful whites. Whether people like that idea or not, it is somewhat reflective of our very vicious world."

The 2010s

2010 - National controversy sparked over the "Ground Zero Mosque" proposal, which would place a Muslim community center in Lower Manhattan, near the site of the 9/11 attacks. Trump offered to buy out one of the investors in the project. In an appearance on The Late Show with David Letterman, Trump argued, "I think it's very insensitive to build it there. I think it's not appropriate, I think it's insensitive and it shouldn't be built there." In reference to Muslims, he also said “Well, somebody’s blowing us up. Somebody’s blowing up buildings, and somebody’s doing lots of bad stuff.”
2011 - Trump played a huge role in the birtherism movement pushing false rumors that Barack Obama was not born in the United States. He sent investigators to Hawaii to look into Obama's birth certificate. Obama later released his birth certificate (not that it ever stopped the conspiracy).
- August 2012, Trump via Twitter: "An 'extremely credible source' has called my office and told me that BarackObama's birth certificate is a fraud."
- September 2012, Trump via Twitter: "Wake Up America! See article: "Israeli Science: Obama Birth Certificate is a Fake"" [I didn't include the article linked in the tweet because it was removed.]
- September 2013, Trump via Twitter: "@obamafraudulent: @realDonaldTrump @d18mt2 The birth certificate that you forced Obama to show is a computer generated forgery."
- June 2014, Trump via Twitter: "Always remember, I was the one who got Obama to release his birth certificate, or whatever that was! Hilary couldn't, McCain couldn't."
- Even in private, Trump continues to push this conspiracy theory.
  - The article linked also shows research linking "birtherism" and racism.
2011 - In addition to the birtherism conspiracy, Trump also argued that Barack Obama wasn't a good enough student to have attended Columbia or Harvard Law, and demanded that he released his university transcripts. He claimed, “I heard he was a terrible student. Terrible. How does a bad student go to Columbia and then to Harvard?”

2016 Candidacy

2015 - Donald Trump launches his 2016 presidential campaign by calling Mexicans "rapists" who are "bringing crime and drugs" into the United States.
2015 - Trump claimed that if he were elected president, he would build a wall around the US-Mexico border and demanded that Mexico would pay for it.
2015 - Trump called for a ban of all Muslims attempting to enter the United States.
- Though it was watered down, his administration eventually implemented a Muslim ban.
- A 2016 Trump ad called for a "shutdown of Muslims entering the US."
2015 - During an appearance at the Republican Jewish Coalition, Trump said, "Look, I'm a negotiator like you folks; we're negotiators."
2015 - When pressed repeatedly for details on his immigration platform, Trump vowed that his administration would create a "humane deportation force." He declined to go into specifics, but claimed that he would deport millions of illegal immigrants, and that it would be doable and cheap.
- He claimed that it would be similar to President Eisenhower's "Operation Wetback" initiative, which deported 1.5 million illegal immigrants by bus, truck, and boat and dropped them off at remote parts of the US-Mexico border.
2016 - During a Republican debate, Trump was asked about his claim, "Islam hates us." When asked if 1.6 billion Muslims hate the US, he responded, "I mean a lot of them."
- The claim originates from this CNN interview which aired the day before the debate.
2016 - Trump argued that Judge Gonzalo Curiel - who presided over the Trump University lawsuit - should recuse himself due to his Mexican heritage and membership with the Latino lawyers association.
2016 - Trump declines to condemn support and endorsements from former KKK leader David Duke and other white supremacists. "Honestly, I don't know David Duke. I don't believe I've ever met him. I'm pretty sure I didn't meet him. And I just don't know anything about him."
- Trump regularly retweeted messages from neo-Nazis and white supremacists.
2016 - At the Republican convention, Trump officially declared himself the "law and order" candidate.
2016 - Trump tweeted (and later deleted) an image showing Hillary Clinton in front of a pile of money and the Star of David that said, "Most Corrupt Candidate Ever!" Despite the backlash, Trump insisted that the Star of David was really a sheriff's badge, and that the campaign shouldn't have taken it down.
- This image was later reposted to Twitter, replacing the Star of David with a circle.
- One of the biggest conspiracies among the alt-right is that politicians are controlled by Jewish money. This article explains how it became huge.
2016 - In a pitch to black voters, Trump said, “You’re living in poverty, your schools are no good, you have no jobs, 58 percent of your youth is unemployed. What the hell do you have to lose?”
2016 - During a campaign rally, Trump pointed out a black man in the crowd and said, "Look at my African-American over here!"

Presidency

2017 - President Trump said during a meeting that Haitians "all have AIDS", and that Nigerian immigrants would never "go back to their huts" in Africa.
2017 - During a White House event to honor the World War II Navajo Code Talkers, Trump went on the attack and referred to Sen. Elizabeth Warren as "Pocahontas."
- Family members of the Navajo Code Talkers resented this racist jab.
2017 - Trump asked April Ryan, a veteran black journalist, to help set up a meeting between him and the Congressional Black Caucus by asking her, "Are they friends of yours?" Prior to this, Trump denounced conditions in inner cities by saying that African-Americans are "living in hell."
- The CBC tweeted: "Hi, @realDonaldTrump. We’re the CBC. We sent you a letter on January 19, but you never wrote us back. Sad!"
  - Here is the letter they wrote to President Trump.
2017 - Trump repeatedly attacked NFL players who protested during the national anthem, claiming that this is "hurting the game."
- He fired off a series of tweets defending the US flag and calling for a boycott of the NFL.
  - Tweets in question: [1], [2], [3], [4]
2017 - A week after the violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, Trump claimed that "many sides" were responsible for the clashing that ensured. He also claimed that there were "very fine people" on "both sides" - equating the white supremacists to the counter-protestors fighting against racism. Trump's briefing was nothing more than a dog whistle to white supremacists.
- White nationalist Richard Spencer praised the president's remarks and thanked him for "defending the truth."
- Here is the White House transcript containing Trump's remarks.
- The White House tried to clarify the president's statement by saying that he condemns hate groups.
- In 2019, Trump was asked if he still thought there were "very fine people on both sides." He responded, "Oh, I’ve answered that question. And if you look at what I said, you will see that that question was answered perfectly. [...] And I was talking about people that went because they felt very strongly about the monument to Robert E. Lee, a great general. Whether you like it or not, he was one of the great generals."
2018 - Trump held a meeting in the Oval Office with lawmakers about protecting immigrants from Haiti, El Salvador, and African countries as part of a bipartisan immigration deal. Referring to these countries, Trump grew frustrated and asked, "Why are we having all these people from shithole countries come here?"
- Trump denied making this comment.
- On the other hand, the White House suggested that this comment and his remarks about the NFL would resonate with his base.
2019 - Trump mocked Elizabeth Warren's presidential campaign in a tweet, referring to her as "Pocahontas" and saying, "See you on the campaign TRAIL, Liz!"
- The capitalization of "TRAIL" refers to the Trail of Tears, an act of ethnic cleansing which forcibly relocated Native Americans and resulted in thousands of deaths.
2019 - Trump fired a series of tweets directed at Reps. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, Ayanna Pressley, Ilhan Omar, and Rashida Tlaib, claiming they are “from countries whose governments are a complete and total catastrophe” and that they should "go back."
- Tweets in question: [1], [2], [3]
2020 - Trump has referred to the coronavirus as the "Chinese virus/China virus" and "kung flu." Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany has defended his usage of this rhetoric, claiming that these names simply connect the virus with its place of origin.
- Trump has been defending his usage of the phrase "Chinese virus" since mid March.
- Since April, Trump has posted and shared multiple tweets containing the phrases "Chinese virus" and "China virus."
- Stop AAPI Hate, an organization dedicated to tracking self-reported hostile anti-Asian instances since late March, says it has received over 2,000 reports since the project began. The group says it saw a surge in reports after Trump began using this rhetoric.
  - The group found that many anti-China comments were frequently associated with verbal and physical assault.
2020 - Trump went on a Twitter rant bashing NASCAR for banning the Confederate flag (and defended the history of the flag), and lashed out at both the Washington Redskins and Cleveland Indians for considering changing team names.
- This sparked Trump's new series of ads claiming that a Biden administration would defund the police.
- Via Twitter, he then accused Chicago and New York City of protecting criminals under the "Sanctuary City" title.
- Trump also attacked Bubba Wallace, the only black NASCAR driver, claiming he was promoting a "hoax" by reporting the finding of a noose in his garage.

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Some compilation articles: 86 Times Trump Displayed or Promoted Islamophobia |Donald Trump's Long History of Clashes with Native Americans | Why Trump Dishonors Native Americans | Trump Keeps Being Racist to Native Americans and Getting Away With It | Trump's Attacks on the Legal Immigration System Explained | Trump's Most Insulting - and Violent - Language Is Often Reserved for Immigrants | The Collected Quotes of Donald Trump on "The Blacks" | The Ever-Growing List of Trump's Most Racist Rants | The Trump Administration's Record of Racism
An interesting find: Woody Guthrie wrote about his contempt for his landlord, Fred Trump

OBLIGATORY FILLER MATERIAL – Just take a hard left at Daeseong-dong…5

Continuing
“Hey, Viv!”, I say, as we’re all being shuttled onto the bus which will take us to our hotel, “Toss me one of those miniatures, if you please. Yeah. Of course, Vodka’ll do. It’s bloody dusty round these parts.”
Viv chuckles and asks if anyone else wants anything. He’s a consummate scrounger and somehow sweet-talked a demure and pulchritudinous female Air China cabin attendant out of her phone number, Email address, and a case of 100 airline liquor miniatures.
That he looks like a marginally graying version of Robert Mitchum in his heyday and speaks fluent Dutch, French, and Italian might explain his success. I mean, a guy with four ex-wives can’t be all wrong, right?
He’s a definite outlier in this crowd. We could be characterized as a batch of aging natural geoscientists who collectively, sans Viv, add up to an approximate eight on the “Looker” scale. Besides the years, the mileage, the climatic, and industrial ravages, it’s a good thing we all have expansive personalities, as most of us are dreadful enough to make a buzzard barf.
But, save for Viv, no one presently here is on the make. Oh, sure; we’ll all sweet talk some fair nubile into a free drink or a double when we really ordered a regular drink, but we’re all married, most terminally, that is, over 35 years and counting. The odd thing is that save and except for Viv, none of us married folk had ever been divorced.
That is strange, considering that the global divorce rate hovers around 50%, and we are often called to be apart from kith and kin for prolonged periods. However, we are always faithful and committed to our marital units and those vows we spoke all those many long decades ago.
But, hey, we’re all seriously male and not anywhere near dead; and there’s no penalty for just looking, right?
Continuing.
We’re all loaded on a pre-war, not certain which war, by the way, bus which stank of fish, kimchee, and diesel fuel. We really don’t care even a tiny, iotic amount. It’s free transport, we’re tired of traveling, and not keen on walking any further than we absolutely have to.
Viv has been passing out boozy little liquor miniatures, and I’ve been handing out cigars since I bought a metric shitload back in Dubai Duty-Free and somehow got them all through customs.
We didn’t light up, as there was neither a driver nor handler present. So, we figured we’d all just wait on the cigars, and concentrate on having a little ground-level “Welcome to Best Korea” party until the powers that be got their collective shit together and provided drivers, herders, and handlers.
We sat there for 15 long minutes. Being the international ambassadors of amity and insobriety, we started making noises like “Hey! Where’s our fucking driver?” and “I am Doctor Academician! Of All State Russian Geological Survey! How dare you make me wait? ”
Suddenly, a couple of characters in ill-fitting gray suits and fake Rays Bans are outside the bus having a collective meltdown. Somehow, someone fucked up and put us on a ‘regular’ bus and not the ‘VIP’ bus. In other words, we got to see what the locals really got to ride around Pyongyang on instead of our supposed to be impressed by the bus that wasn’t there; but was now just arriving.
A spanking new purple-and-chrome Mercedes long-haul bus shows up. It even has our group name emblazoned above the placard that normally tells where the bus is headed or who it is for: “’국제 석유 지질 과학 연합’ [Gugje Seog-yu Jijil Gwahag Yeonhab] or ‘International Union of Petroleum Geological Sciences’”.
We are brusquely ordered off our present bus and into the opulent, obviously bespoke, bright yellow faux-leather interior Mercedes-Benz Tourismo RH M. It’s so new and so obviously a ploy to get us to think that all things here are so new and opulent, it even smells of that new car, ah, bus, aroma.
“Well, we’ll take care of that soon enough”, I muse, as the bus is equipped with ashtrays and we’re going on the scenic route to our hotel, which is only 25 or so kilometers from the airport. However, it was announced that it’ll take us about 2 hours to get to our hotel since we need to see the city in its best light and get a feeling for the town if we should ever find ourselves lost and alone.
We all know what’s going on. They’re getting our rooms ‘ready’ for our arrival and need some extra time to make sure everything’s all wired in and transmitting properly.
“Guys”, I muse to our new handlers, “I’ve been to the Soviet Union, pre-wall fall. I stayed in places where I was definitely among the first westerners ever to grace their porticos. We’re a busload of natural scientists, of eight different nationalities, covering the economic spectrum from staunch capitalism to sociable socialism to hard-core communism. You even think for a second we’re going to spill any beans about anything you’d find interesting or useful? Think again.”
In fact, it would become a running joke between us all to see what sort of fake bombshells we could drop into the normal conversation what would give the listener’s the greatest case of the jibblies.
But for now, our bags were all loaded into the cargo compartment of this very, very nice, I must admit, mode of conveyance. Our handlers: ‘Yuk’, ‘No’, ‘Man’, and ‘Kong’, are all seated upfront and please with their latest tally of bodies. We have a couple of shady fellow travelers with the knock-off Ray-Bans and shiny gray suits that just appeared out of the woodwork in the back, seated by the loo, watching over all of us, and we’re going on a fucking city tour, whether we like it or not.
We’re all present and accounted for. Let’s keep our camera in our bags for the time being as the drinking and smoking lights had just been lit as the bus fired up its new German-engineered and machined precision diesel engine.
The bus rumbled to life and after a moment or two of checking that all dials, gauges, and indicators were where they were supposed to be; without so much as a cursory glance, we pulled out into traffic.
Except there was none.
Not another bus, pushbike, tap-tap, scooter, car, truck, hover-board, or motorcycle in sight.
Nothing.
Seems we were a big deal. They shut down the main drag so we wouldn’t be encumbered by such proletariat things like traffic jams or people-things cluttering the roadway, clambering for a look at the Western scientific cadre.
So, away we whizzed, sans traffic and into the very belly of the beast, and onward; eventually, towards our hotel.
Our handlers were very kind to point out passing scenes of interest.
“Look, look! There’s the Potong River. Notice all the lovely birds, ‘eh what? See the Norwegian Blue? Beautiful plumage!”
“See here, look. Here’s the Taedong River. Many forms of fish in the river. Maybe we’ll see some fishermen. If you like, we can stop, and ask them about today’s catch.”
We all declined, as we were certain that the fish the ‘random fisherman’ we’d talk to was flown in fresh from elsewhere earlier in the day.
Besides, we were comfortable. We had our drinks, our cigars, and we were leaving the driving to someone else.
After being driven around the city and seeing all the wonderful monuments, like the faux Arch of Triumph, which looks exactly unlike its namesake Arc de Triomphe de l'Étoile in Paris.
The Arch of Reunification, a monument to the goal of a reunified Korea, which, by necessity, is unfinished. Then there’s the Tomb of King Tongmyŏng, where people are lining up, just dying’ to get in.
Finally, we all called for our hotel, the Yanggakdo, after yet another mausoleum, the Kumsusan Memorial Palace of the Sun.
Arches or tombs. Such a stunning array of monuments and places of less than moderate interest.
We were interested in Mirae Scientists street (Future Scientists street). It is a street in a newly developed area in Pyongyang to house scientific institutions of the Kim Chaek University of Technology and its employees. But we were told that it was too late, there was not much there to see, we needed to express written permission to visit, and we’d be going there tomorrow or next week.
We wheel into the parking lot of the Yanggakdo Hotel and are immediately unimpressed by the pseudo-Baroque concrete fiasco that appears to stand, wobbly, before us. It’s a page right out of the Soviet Construction-For-The-Masses Handbook. A cold, gray concrete edifice with multitudes of seemingly little, tiny windows. A perfect metaphor for our travels thus far; look at the expansiveness of Best Korean wonders, through this pinhole.
However, we judged too soon. We were told to go inside and check-in, whilst our luggage would be de-bussed for us and handled by the expertly efficient hotel staff. The lobby was opulent, tastefully laid out in earth tones of facades of veneers of marble, granite, some garnet-mica schist, if my hand lens doesn’t lie, some Prepaleozoic anatectic migmatite, displaying intricate and intense plication, xenoliths, and graphic delineation of minerals by segregation through melting points. There was a gigantic well-appointed and well kept up aquarium, complete with snuffling sharks and nuclear-submarine sized groupers.
Very handsome indeed. Impressions increasing slightly.
Then we see that there’s a bloody casino on the bottom floor of the hotel, several bars interspersed throughout the hotel, and karaoke, of which I’m not terribly fond, but some of my European counterparts almost swooned at the prospect. There are a large pool and weight rooms/gymnasia, saunas and places to relax outside of one’s room, but still under the watchful eye of the thousands of ill-concealed video cameras at every turn.
“Covert surveillance” may be a thing in Best Korea, but it’s a practice still leaves a lot to be desired. The Eastern Siberian Russians back before the wall fell were more covert with their obvious button audio microphones woven into the fabric covering the headboard of your Intourist bed than the Best Koreans here. Their cameras were ‘disguised’ as flower arrangements, overhead lights, and speakers inexplicably placed into things like standing ashtrays, refuse bins, and randomly placed holes in the wall.
The floors were all covered with exquisite what looked to be hand-woven rugs of most vibrant crimson and gold; the usual Communistic colors. Always with some sort of floral pattern or pattern that’s supposed to be reflective of nature, as I was told. Evidently, for workers to remember what nature was as they don’t get out much with 14 to 16 hours workdays here in the Worker’s Paradise.
Enough of the travelogue; we all wander up to the front desk, and each with their own passport in hand, request our reserved rooms. We supposed that we would all have rooms on different floors as the reservations were made, expired, re-made, juggled, rebooked, allowed to expire, re-jiggered, and finally formalized a scant week before we left the UK.
Nope. No such luck. We were all on the 39th floor. The place boasts 47 floors, of which, the top floor is a revolving restaurant. Evidently, food tastes better when you’re rotating.
However, it won’t spin unless you first buy a drink.
We had that thing whirling like a NASA centrifuge after its discovery the second night.
Yeah, all 12 of us are bivouacked on the 39th floor. A floor with approximately 30 rooms.
I guess we could have played “Room Roulette” and see who got which room and who’s luggage. Or we could switch every day or two to drive our handlers nuts. Or, we could just take our assigned rooms, which were conveniently located one empty room apart.
Meaning, no one had adjoining rooms. Why? Fuck if I know. We didn’t spend much time in our rooms, and that time was either sleeping or showering. We’d all meet at the bar, casino, restaurant, karaoke, bowling alley (all three lanes) or actual meeting rooms every once in a while when we thought we should get together and compare notes. It was the most inexplicable situation.
Plus, we spent an inordinate amount of time waiting on the fucking elevators to take us to our room. These elevators, and if you think you’re going to get a batch of aging senior scientists to schlep it up 39 floor’s worth of stairs, think again; are the slowest elevators in the civilized world. And that was the consensus of scientists representing not only Europe and North America, but Russia as well. 15-25 minutes added to each journey, up or down; stopping on every floor, except 5, on the way down..
Jesus Q. Fuck, dudes. If you can’t construct a bleedin’ elevator that works better than those at the Sozvezdie Medveditsy Guest House in Lesosibirsk, Eastern Siberia; then I suggest you seriously rethink your plans for world domination and new world order.
Grako and Erwin once, while waiting for the fucking elevator, figured out that we were earning some US$25 each just to wait for the lift to arrive and take us to our rooms. Every day. Sometimes several times per day.
With that, we all agreed to toss our “waiting time” funds into a kitty and on our last day of captivity here, blow it all in the hotel casino. Whatever became of that would be donated to the Koreans we thought most deserving of our largesse.
Would it be our handlers? How about the Korean Scientists we’d be meeting? The affable and most accommodating concierge? Or that plucky little Korean charwoman who was always on our floor and kept everything spotless, right down to our freshly laundered and pressed field clothes and newly polished field boots; done without our requesting or knowledge?
Only time would tell.
It could be a fortune or it could be bupkiss. Just like our expectations of the Heavenly Kingdom where we were currently sequestered.
As it was, with our official protestations, they kept only photocopies of our passports as we roundly refused and threatened a full-scale karaoke battle right here in the lobby if they didn’t relinquish our passports immediately. I had broken out my nastiest cigar and was primed to offend.
With that, we all had our keys and trooped over to the elevators for our first, of many, inexplicable waits. We made many uncharitable and potentially nasty remarks about the Anti-Western posters that made up some of the wall décor. Once we finally made it to our floor, we all fanned out to find our rooms. Viv found his first and was quite pleased to report to the rest of us that there was a “Welcome” basket in his room.
We all hoped that we would be receiving one a well.
I was in room 3914; which I considered a close call, but later only wondered as there was no 3913. Upon entering, I saw it was 1980s Hotel 6 opulent, but with an excellent over-city view. True it was late, dark, and the city was only somewhat lit up; I was looking forward to the view of the town in full daylight.
The room had a ‘king’ bed; that is if the king in question was Tutankhamen, the stubby, Egyptian boy king. The bed had no mattress pad and no box spring but it was hard enough for my liking. Many of my compatriots didn’t agree and complained bitterly. They eventually received thin mattress pads for all their kvetching.
There was an ancient Japanese color television, which only had 2 English language channels - Al Jazeera and the BBC, which was on a dated news loop. Watching the local channel is amusing though; the ads for ‘personal enhancements’ were hilarious, even without understanding a word of the language.
There were a couple of chairs and a low table, built-in dresser drawers for our clothes, a rusty and probably unusable room safe with corroded batteries, a small table built out of the wall that would serve as my travel office, and would-you-believe, a rotary telephone; how’s that for nostalgia?
There was an old-model radio built into the nightstand next to the bed. I was very surprised to find it not only received AM, FM but shortwave as well. I had brought along a pair of Bose headphones and during some rainy down days, spent many fun-filled, and I mean that sincerely, hours DXing from the comfort of my ‘enormous’ king bed.
Beyond that, the room was very nondescript. Like any other of the millions of rooms in hotels around the world that unlike here, aren’t claiming a 5-star rating. I mean, it was clean, if not a little long in the tooth. But didn’t smell too terrible, even after I took care of that with my Camacho offerings. It was utilitarian, everything worked, even the water pressure, which surprisingly could strip off layers of one’s skin if you weren’t careful.
The bathroom, though no Jacuzzi, had a large enough bathtub for the occasional soaking period. Western accouterments in the bathroom were also welcome additions. My knees can’t handle the traditional squat-holes any longer.
There were an electric teapot and several brands of tea, but no coffee. A quick “Gee! I sure wish I had some coffee!” to the four walls and damned if 30 minutes later, a porter didn’t arrive to replenish my tea and courtesy in-room coffee…
There was a small Japanese brand in-room refrigerator which I thought might house a mini-bar. Oh, no! It was actually a complimentary larder stocked with all sorts of Best Korean goodies. Multiple cans of Taedonggang beer. Several bottles of Pyongyang Soju, in various flavors ranging anywhere from 16.8 to 53 percent alcohol by volume. My fridge was skewed towards the right-hand side of the bell curve; the more heavy-duty boozy side.
Evidently, my reputation had preceded me again.
There was a selection of German-style wheat beers from the Taedonggang Brewery and the more familiar ales, steam beers, and lagers. There were some imported beers like Heineken, Bavaria, Pils, a couple of Japanese brands: Asahi and Kirin, and something called ‘Hello Beer’ from Singapore.
There were also ‘sampler’ bottles of Apricot Pit wine, and a couple of high-alcohol fruity liquors made from constituents such as apple or pear, and mushrooms. There were also special medicinal liquors like ‘Rason’s Seal Penis Liquor’.
That is going home with me unopened.
There were a couple of bottles of local sake, called Chonju. Finally, there was a couple ‘samplers’ of homemade alcohol known as Makkoli. Plus there was something called ‘Corn Grotto’, which for the life of me, looks and tastes much like a very passable Kentucky Sippin’ Bourbon.
I put our concierge on instant danger money the very next day. He’s yet to source me more than a fifth of the stuff so far.
I found that there is a popular drink here which mirrors the Yorsch of Mother Russia. Beer and soju can be mixed to create *somaek’; a foamy, frothy, funky drink of many flavors, depending on the soju chosen.
Is ethnoimbibology at thing? The science of how different cultures drink and the effects of drinking culture on different societies. If not, now I have another Ph.D. to pursue after I endow a chair at some likely Asian university.
Anyways, in everyone’s room was a “welcome” basket, just chock full of Best Korean goodies. Postcards, stamps, ads for coin sets, stamp proofs and other goodies that could be purchased at the hotel. There was a field notebook, which I thought was a very nice addition, newspapers, cookies, crackers, biscuits, candies, fruit drinks, and some fresh fruit; although tamarind chewies and durian chips aren’t on my list of personal favorites.
There were a couple of tour books, just chock full of staged photos. These were very nice as well, as so far, we haven’t had much time for shopping outside of government stores or smaller family-run shops in town or out in the boonies.
A few of us were hungry and decided to see what the hotel had to offer room service-wise.
Bupkiss.
But, they did have a selection of restaurants. There is a Chinese restaurant, a European restaurant, and a Korean restaurant on site but they all serve the same food...a Best Korean attempt at western food. And it was weird being the only ones in the restaurant even though it was fully staffed.
We grazed lightly and decided to do some late-night perambulations around our hotel. Our handlers admonished us to stay within the confines of the hotel, or see them if it was absolutely necessary to go walkabout. In the hotel, we were on our own.
We found that there were tunnels in the hotel’s basement. The basement tunnels were a real bonus. There’s a bar with pool tables, a karaoke room, bowling, and a massage parlor, where I was beaten and pummeled into submission by tiny, diminutive, little Korean lassies fully 1/5th my size.
It was wonderful.
There was a hairdresser’s, who were completely befuddled by my shoulder-length silver-gray locks and full gray Grizzly Adams beard. They did provide a lovely shampoo/cranial massage though for the equivalent of US$2.
There were a couple of shops selling Chinese goods rather than local stuff, which was sort of disappointing, a cold noodle bar, and another casino. No shops selling Korean Communist propaganda posters, as I wanted to augment my Soviet-era collection. Perhaps I’ll find something in-country later on.
We were shocked to find that the casino had WiFi that was uncensored and we were able to access; after a fee of liquor miniatures and a cigar or two. We were supposed to have access to the global internet, not local intranet, from the universities that we would be visiting. However, all of that was under the heavily squinting eyes of handlers and guys in shiny suits wearing fake Ray-Bans.
I still had my secret satellite internet lash-up available, but that was iffy, a pain in the ass to set up, and ridiculously expensive. However, it did work on the 39th floor and the times I used it instead of wandering down to the tunnels, no one appeared to be the wiser. Thus far.
So typically, we’d just head to the basement casino with our laptops, iPads, and phones. Bam! Robert’s your Sister’s Husband, we could connect more-or-less free with the outside world; hence how you are reading this now.
Herro! “Yes, I’d sure like another beer. This time a porter, if you please.”
The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain. Or the more they put into locks, the easier they are to pick.
Besides, we were told we’d have access to unfettered and free internet. OK, so we just found it for ourselves. Whaddya expect? We’re scientists, motherfucker, back off.
Ahem.
Back to reality.
The breakfast buffet the next morning had a wide choice of Asian and Western food, although the choices seemed to be the same every day. The main event was to beat the Chinese tourists to the egg station every morning. Breakfast always included fried eggs, a limited selection of pork, kippered fish, potatoes, rice, fruit, and a very Titanium-dioxide-white white bread
After a while, I took to going to the small market behind the lobby, buying some imported Chinese or Japanese nibbly bits and heading to the tunnels for a few breakfast beers before the long hard day’s work. It took almost a week, but I gained the trust of some of the workers in the tunnels and they showed me the on-site microbrewery at the hotel. It produced very passable, and very, very cheap beers of several varieties.
Liquid bread. Beer. Is there nothing it can’t do?
After breakfast our first day at the hotel, we were told to meet in the Conference Room “Il-sung” as we were going to have a ‘Welcome foreign imperialist scientists’ introduction and indoctrination.
Besides our handlers and the shiny-suit squad, there were several Korean folks we didn’t recognize. These were students, scientists, and scholars from the Kim Chaek University of Technology, Kim Il-sung University, the Pyongyang University of Science and Technology; all hailing from Pyongyang, and the University of Geology from North Hwanghae Province.
“Oh, marvelous”, Erlen remarked, “It’s going to be a bloody Chautauqua. We’ll be here all day.”
“Well”, I replied, “It could be worse. We could be on a bus headed off on another unscheduled road trip.”
As we found our seats, our Korean counterparts were busily setting up portable screens, like the ones your grandfather had for showing his 2.1 Googleplex worth of travel slides every Christmas or Thanksgiving get-together. They had a couple of ancient Chinese brand laptops that could have doubled for body armor, they were so thick and heavy.
While they fiddled with running cords for the overhead projectors and 16mm film projector; yes, it was going to be movie time as well, the hotel’s restaurant folks wheeled in carts laden with scones, cupcakes, and other sweet sorts of bakery. Another cart was wheeled in with pump-pots of hot water, tea, and coffee. Usual scientific meeting fare.
There was one final cart that made the day bearable. It held a pony keg of hotel micro-brewed beer on ice, with several dozen frosty mugs available for all who wanted to partake.
There were instantly 12 mugs that were spoken for.
I grabbed a cold beer and wandered around the conference room, sipping beer, chewing on an unlit cigar, and just trying to be pleasant to our hosts and their scientific guests. I was surprised when one North Korean professor, who spoke amazingly British-tinged English, offered me a light for my cigar.
“Is smoking allowed here?” I asked.
“Allowed?” he laughed heartily, “My good man, it’s practically a prerequisite.”
“Here then”, I said, offering him a nice, unctuous Camacho, “Try one of mine.”
Dr. P'ung Kwang-Seon of the North Korean University of Geology became my instant and lifelong friend at that moment.
We had a very nice chat, much to the chagrin of the gray suit cadre, who could hear what we were talking about, but probably didn’t understand anything beyond every 8th word.
After a while, we were asked to take our seats, after refreshing our drinks, and introduced to the group of Korean geoscientists we’d be interacting with during our stay here in Best Korea.
I tried to record every name, but between the students, other scholars, and professors from the various universities, I decided I’d ask for a list of participants once the day had worn on. After all, they had all our names, references, and resumes if the thick folio they kept referring to was any indication.
There were a couple of hours of introductions, as every one of the Korean geoscientists there introduced themselves, mostly through translators, told of their personal area of specialty, and their latest work.
Most were what would be considered geoscientists, but oddly enough, not one that you would consider a petroleum geoscientist, however tangentially.
There were geomorphologists, structural geologists, petrologists, mineralogists, marine geologists, engineering geologists, and seismologists. However, there were no stratigraphers, sedimentologists, paleontologists, or geochemists. We were all geoscientists, but apart from the obvious Korean:English disparity, it was as if we spoke different scientific languages as well.
That would be our first hurdle to overcome.
They had no oil industry here; none whatsoever, therefore why one would bother with the geosciences that fed directly into petroleum? That, in and of itself, would make it difficult to explore for oil in the country. Couple that with the fact that they’re so insular, think their version of ‘science’ is the best, at least that’s the official line, and think all other’s ‘science’ is capitalistic, substandard, and inferior doesn’t bode well for your country discovering anything either oily or gassy.
We were having another conclave around the beer keg, ack, err…a ‘coffee break’ and I mentioned this fact to my scientific colleagues.
“Guys”, I need input here, “We’re going to get precisely nowhere if they won’t even acknowledge that they have major problems from the start.”
Ivan replies, “Very true. I’ve seen this before back home. You get a group so entrenched in their own little corner of science, they can’t even accept or acknowledge that others exist. Not only exist but actually know more about a certain problem than do you.”
Dax joins the fray, “Sure, that’s very true, but who’s going to tell them this unfortunate fact? They could take that as a personal, national, and global insult. Imagine you’re at an international conference and a bunch of foreigners walk in just to tell you you’ve been doing it all wrong for the last 75 years.”
I add, “Remember, though. These characters are scientists as well. I think it’ll be a good measure of seeing what sort of science and scientist we’re dealing with here. If they are truly researchers, they’ll listen to and evaluate what we say as for veracity and accuracy. If they’re just a bunch of Commie goons; no offense, Comrade Academician Ivan, they’ll get all pissed off, kick us out, and we get to go home and enjoy our triple Force Majeure pay.”
Ivan walks over and deliberately steps on the toes of my newly polished field boots.
“In Soviet Russia, field boots walk on YOU.” He laughs in his heavily inflected, and scary, Soviet-era speech…
“Yes, I agree”, Joon adds, “But who is going to address this issue with our hosts? Perhaps one of our Russian comrades, as they are, or were, more politically aligned with our Korean friends and perhaps best understand the issue?”
Ack speaks up, grinning maniacally, “No, I disagree. We should have the one person here who so encapsulates the ideologies and political leanings that they love to hate here so much. You know; the quiet, diminutive, and soft-spoken North American…”
Dax recoils, “Oh, no! I’m not going out in front of this mob of ornery Orientals…”
I smile wanly and tell Dax to cool out.
“Relax, Dax. They’re talking about me.”
“Oh, yes”, a collective group of voices replies, “Yes. Let out fearless Team Leader break the bad news to our Eastern Colleagues. That way we can gauge their reactions to being bounced around scientifically by a member of the Evil Capitalist Cartel.”
“OK”, I reply, “I’ll do it. But be forewarned, my fine feathered fiends. I get stuck on a topic that’s not precisely my bailiwick, I’m going to throw your ass to the wolves. Remember, we’re all in this together.”
Whoops, and catcalls were reduced to mumbles and ‘Aw, fucks.’.
Chautauqua resumption was called and I asked for the floor.
It was a bit off the agenda, but since they’ve been chewing the air for the last several hours, they understood it would be appropriate for us to at least try and get a word in edgewise.
I downed my beer, and grabbed a fresh one as what I was going to say was going to be harsh, cut-and-dried, and rather pointed. But delivered in a pleasant manner.
I hoped.
This all had to be filtered through a series of translators, one for general conversational Korean and another for the more technical and scientific transliterations. I realized I was going to be up here for a while. So, I brought a cigar.
One way or another, I was going to deliver our pronouncements and hell, I may as well be comfortable while doing it.
.
“Greetings and felicitations, my Eastern Colleagues. Let me first say how nice it is to be here in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea as part of the ….”
I’m going to fast-forward through all the flowery bullshit and introductory happiness; I’ll going to just cut to the guts of the matter.
“…Now, you do know why there has been virtually no oil, gas nor any other hydrocarbon related deposit discovered here in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea?” I asked by way of a rhetorical question.
I sipped my beer and lit my cigar. In for a chon, in for a won.
I let the buzzing subside on the side of our eastern counterparts.
“Because, and please do not take this as insulting or derogatory, but as a statement of irrefutable fact, no one with the proper training nor experience has been looking. You’re historically guilty of applying the science incorrectly and letting dogma and politics guide your search, instead of the scientific method and the facts. Geology, like all natural science, is just as truth based on the facts for a capitalist as it is for a communist. Reality is not influenced by your beliefs, be they scientific or political, secular or spiritual, ‘trusted’ rather than ‘thought’; any more than by your wish that it wouldn’t rain today during a raging thunderstorm.”
Little Boy over Hiroshima was dropped with less effect.
Our Democratic People's Republic of Korea colleagues erupted into a chaotic mixture of stuttering, internecine yelling, accusations, and sputtering.
Calling for decorum, I figured that since I was this far gone, I may as well push the plunger all the way to the bottom.
“Gentlemen, I do not denigrate the science of geology as taught and practiced here in Best Korea.” I actually said that, sort of a slip of the tongue. Continuing, “However, one would not fish for Bluefin tuna from a rowboat in a pond with a fly rod. One does not hunt bear in the city with a slingshot. Just as one doesn’t search for oil and gas with mining engineers, geomorphologists, and seismologists.”
I let that sink in and after the translation, they calmed a bit and wanted to hear the rest of what I had to say. I could sense a couple was less than thrilled with what I had to say, but forging onward…
“One fishes for Bluefin tuna in the deep ocean with huge rods, reels and a specialist boat captained by someone with deep experience in hunting the elusive fish. One hunts bear in the proper environment, the taiga or forest, with the proper tools and guided by one with the education, learnedness, and experience to know how to make the hunt come out successful.”
Hit them with some analogies they can relate to and digest. Now, go for the carotid.
“Just like one does not hunt oil and gas without stratigraphers, sedimentologists, geophysicists, petrophysicists, and other oil and gas experts who have the education, experience, and knowledge to know where to look. Knowing which environment looks most conductive to hide your quarry, if you’ll pardon the pun, and how best to find them, the guys who know how to corral and de-risk them once you find them, and the engineers and technologists who know how to bring them to the surface so they can be utilized.”
They had stopped being irritated and were listening in rapt attention.
“My colleagues and I have spent the last few days going over, in detail the geology of your country. There is nothing we can see that would preclude the development, entrapment, and preservation of economic quantities of oil and gas. Ture, the geology is quite complex as is the structural history of the entire peninsula. That’s one other thing you will have to accept. Geology doesn’t give the tiniest shit about political boundaries. One must look at the big picture, and that doesn’t stop at some man-made borders. Ignore that fact at your peril, because if you continue to view the geology here as not existing across political boundaries, you are preadapting yourself for failure.”
Drs. Ivan, Volna, and Morse make certain that everyone sees the ex-Soviets agreeing with the bushy-bearded, cigar-chomping American capitalist.
“So,” I said, hoping to bring this little spit-balling session to a fortuitous close, “If we can have an agreement; scientific agreement, on these points, then I am certain we can find a way forward with not only this discussion but the program we can devise for the best Korean (notice phase shift?) geologists to take the project forward both scientifically soundly and economically successful.”
My North Korean counterpart gets up from his seat in the conference room, goes to the keg, taps a couple of beers and walks up to the podium where I was standing.
“Thank you, Dr. Rocknocker, for saying what needed to be said”, he spoke in perfect English as he handed me a beer.
I grinned and gratefully accepted the beer.
“Why, Dr. Chang Kwang-Su”, I said, as that was his name, “You old fraud. You do speak English; and very well, I must add.”
“Yes, almost all of us do”, he relayed, “But, as you said, we are most reserved. We were more or less under orders of the ‘most illustrious’, to play coy, and act as if we spoke no English.”
“I see.” I said, “I’ve worked in several FSU countries as well as Russia and saw that there as well. I guess old habits die hard.”
“That they do, Doctor.”, he replied, “But, we must now tell you the truth. We knew exactly what you said is true, and we agree. We are not as totally insulated from the outside world as some suspect.”
“Well, I was going on what your superiors related to us. Like the police that had all their toilets stolen, I had nothing else to go on.” I replied.
“Ah, ha! Quite!”, he chuckled, “We had long suspected that we were lacking in certain areas of scholarship. What you said cements that fact as it was an independent conclusion. We can now present that to our superiors with the caveat that unless we bolster work and training in these areas, the hunt of hydrocarbon resources here will be for naught.”
“I am relieved”, I said, truthfully. “I was slightly concerned that some might take umbrage to being told their science is not up to specifications. I tried to be the bearer of that bad news but deliver it gently. Here, I find you need that to use that as a truncheon to smack one’s boss upside the head and tell him that an upgrade is required. And fast.”
“Ah, so”, he replies, “We are in total agreement. Now that is out of the way, we would appreciate it if you’d help in designing a course of study for up and coming local geoscientists. Then, we can go forward with a great plan to search for oil and gas here in…Korea. Correct?”
“Absolutely”, I remarked, “You’ve got over 400 man-years of science and exploration expertise here in this room alone. Let’s shoot for the moon, so to speak. Let’s get you up to speed on scientific journals and articles that are available out there in all of academia and industry. Let’s get you communicating on a global basis. Let’s prove that you can talk science with global scientists and still not have it affect your political or nationalistic aspirations one little bit. Let’s see if we can drag you, figuratively speaking, kicking and screaming, into the 21st century.”
“Doctor”, Dr. Chang remarked, “You are the embodiment of what we were always told what Americans are. Brash, loud, confident, and evil. Except for evil, you are American as we were led to believe.”
“Hey, I take that as a compliment”, I exclaim. “You think that’s bad, I’ve got a bunch of earnest Europeans, raucous Russians, and a couple of cagey Canadians on my side as well. Before we’re finished here, we’ll have you ordering hachee, dining on Caldo Verde, snacking on salmiakki, drinking Russkaya vodka with Pabst Blue Ribbon beer, eating poutine, and rooting for the Packers.”
“Doctor, I don’t know what half of that means, but I hope it comes to pass. It sounds most fascinating.” Dr. Chang chuckles.
The rest of the day was spent with various groups crystallizing and breaking off from the main crowd; then reforming as different groups. This was good, as it showed an interest across not only national borders but across ideologies and scientific specialties.
Most everyone here spoke English with some degree of fluency, so the translators were called in only occasionally.
I made certain they were included in everything that transpired that day. I want everyone to feel ‘part of the team’. How better to show the classlessness of Western science to include everyone in on both sides of every discussion and activity?
To be continued…

Wrestling Observer Rewind ★ Jun. 21, 1999

Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
PREVIOUS YEARS ARCHIVE: 1991 • 1992 • 1993 • 1994 • 1995 • 1996 • 1997 • 1998


1-4-1999	1-11-1999	1-18-1999	1-25-1999
2-1-1999	2-8-1999	2-15-1999	2-22-1999
3-1-1999	3-8-1999	3-15-1999	3-22-1999
3-29-1999	4-5-1999	4-12-1999	4-19-1999
4-26-1999	5-3-1999	5-10-1999	5-17-1999
5-24-1999	5-31-1999	6-7-1999	6-14-1999

Stemming from the death of Owen Hart, as expected, the Hart family filed a lawsuit this week against the WWF, Vince and Linda McMahon, the stunt coordinators, the manufacturers of the harness and cables used, the city of Kansas City, and the owners of the Kemper Arena alleging negligence in the stunt that killed him. Martha Hart, her children, and Owen's parents Stu and Helen are listed as plaintiffs. They all, along with Bret Hart, appeared at a press conference when the lawsuit was announced. "My children have lost their father, and I have lost the love of my life, because of the greed of the WWF and its insistence that its wrestlers take ever-greater chances to attract entertainment dollars in this era of extreme sports," said Martha Hart. Dave doesn't have all the details of the lawsuit at press time since it was just filed right before this issue came out, but he will have a lot more detail next week.
A separate criminal investigation is still ongoing, with police looking into the rigging and if proper safety precautions were followed. The most likely charge, if any, would be involuntary manslaughter and Dave says there would need to be a lot of evidence to actually be able to file a charge for that. He thinks it'll be difficult to prove anything to that extent. The Kemper Arena people are pleading ignorance, basically saying, "Hey we just rented them the building, we had nothing to do with any of that." The police have also ruled out foul play, saying no one pushed Hart off and his harness wasn't tampered with. No one was standing near Owen when he fell.
Sable made an appearance on WCW Nitro this week, being shown multiple times sitting in the front row, which raises a lot of legal issues. The showed several close-ups and also had her wave at the camera, though they never identified her. Bischoff only barely acknowledged it on commentary, saying that he's seen that woman in Playboy. Last week on Nitro, they did an angle where someone drove a Humvee into Kevin Nash's limo and on WCW's website, Bischoff strongly hinted that Sable was the driver. Anyway, in this case, WCW is denying any knowledge that Sable would be there, simply claiming that she bought a ticket to the show. WWF and WCW still have pending lawsuits against each other that have been dragging on for years. Sable has her lawsuit against WWF and of course, now they're dealing with the Owen Hart lawsuit. In fact, WWF was also sued this week by the Kuwaiti TV announcer that Vader beat up a couple of years ago for $1.5 million. WCW may be hoping that since WWF has so many legal problems right now that they may not challenge Sable's contract status. Dave thinks that's a dangerous gamble on WCW's part because WWF has to protect their contracts and can't risk setting a precedent of allowing people to jump ship while still under contract and letting it go unpunished. Plus, it could backfire. Goldberg is in the midst of a contract dispute with WCW right now. What happens if he shows up on Raw next week the same way Sable did? If that were to happen, WCW wouldn't have much of a leg to stand on in court now that they've done it first. No word yet on how WWF plans to respond to Sable's Nitro appearance.

WATCH: Sable appears on Nitro

Anyway, last week WWF sent Sable a cease and desist, ordering her to stop using the name Sable from this point forward. The main reason is because WWF is attempting to get a cut of the profits from the upcoming Playboy issue featuring her and they're trying to work out a deal to allow Playboy to market her as "Sable" when they release it. WWF was upset that Sable struck her own deal with Playboy for this 2nd issue, going behind their backs to do so. Her contract calls for WWF to act as her agent on such deals and since the first Playboy was such a monster hit, there's obviously a lot of money to be made with a 2nd one.
Sable was also interviewed in TV Guide this week and had a lot to say about the company. She basically said everyone backstage is on drugs (even suggesting that many of the ring crew and stagehands are on drugs) and criticized WWF for continuing the show after Owen Hart died. When asked why she was willing to pose for Playboy but didn't want to go along with "accidentally" exposing her breasts on TV, she said, "There is a time and place for that. I do not feel like--in the middle of a wrestling arena where they're serving alcohol and there are screaming fans, including children, in the front row--I don't feel like that is the proper place to be exposed." When asked what happened after she refused, she said she was de-pushed and they scripted her to lose the women's title. When asked about the claim in her lawsuit that male wrestlers would poke holes through walls to watch the women's dressing room, Sable said that her and the other women complained to management about it repeatedly. She said she felt unsafe being backstage. She also noted that her WWF contract was for $150,000 guarantee, which was less than what men in the company make. There was also a claim in Sable's lawsuit that a fellow wrestler threatened to bite and disfigure her face to ruin her career and nothing was done. Dave says that word is Luna Vachon was the one who said that. And to say nothing was done isn't quite true, since she was fired soon after for multiple instances of misconduct, including that.
WCW Great American Bash is in the books and to say it was bad would be an understatement and an insult to bad shows. The company reeks of desperation right now. The event saw the return of Sid Vicious, "who has walked out on every contract and every company he's been with for his entire career." Plus, he was fired from WCW a few years ago for trying to murder Arn Anderson. Speaking of, rumors that Anderson okayed this deal are false. He was never told about it in advance and found out Sid had signed with WCW when he showed up to the arena. Bringing back Sid and putting him in the world title picture is a desperate move by a desperate company. Of course, this also means the end of Sid in ECW. Dave also takes this moment to rant on WCW bringing in Master P, talking about a press conference they held where Master P seemed clueless about WCW and didn't even know Curt Hennig's name (they're supposed to be feuding) and how Bischoff was kissing his ass the whole time and says it's become a game where WWF and WCW compete over which of them can sign the biggest celebrities and suck up to them. And these celebs are often here just to collect a check, which hurts the product. He also talks about how WCW just immediately kills the appeal of anyone they bring in. Master P is already seeming like a failure. Dennis Rodman proved last year that he's not worth the money they spent to bring him in. They signed Tank Abbott to a 3-year deal, hyped him for one episode of Nitro, and then already seem to have given up on him. So what's next? Dave half-jokingly wonders if WCW has Jake Roberts' phone number.

WATCH: Master P's WCW press conference

Oh yeah, the PPV. The show wasn't sold out, only drawing 11,600 to an arena that holds 13,000. And even of those that were there, the crowd was heavily papered so paid attendance was significantly less. Dave notes that last month, WWF sold out the same arena for a house show that didn't even have Austin or Undertaker on it. The 2 opening matches were Hak vs. Brian Knobbs and Van Hammer vs. Mikey Whipwreck, leading Dave to wonder why WCW would use those guys but somehow couldn't figure out a way to get Billy Kidman or Juventud Guerrera on the show. Scott Norton was supposed to face Ernest Miller (and lose) but didn't work the show due to high blood pressure. Dave seems to suspect Norton just didn't want to do the job. Ric Flair vs. Roddy Piper was "the single worst PPV match Flair has ever been in." Sting vs. Rick Steiner gets negative stars, as did Kevin Nash vs. Randy Savage. Dave goes into a whole rant about the tag title match, saying there's backstory from earlier in the week. It's a long confusing mess, but basically, Ric Flair was supposed to be involved in an angle with Benoit on Thunder last week, but nobody at WCW sent word that he was booked for the show or sent him a plane ticket. So on the afternoon of Thunder, WCW realized their mistake and told Flair to get to Syracuse for the show ASAP. They spent thousands of dollars chartering a jet to fly him there and spent most of the show booking it on the fly and stalling, hoping he would make it before they went off the air. He finally arrived at the arena with 10 minutes left in the live show but by then, they had already re-booked things, and told Flair he was no longer needed. Anyway, the booking change on Thunder is what led to DDP and Kanyon winning the tag titles on this PPV.
UFC approved a new rule book that addresses a lot of issues. Dave breaks down everything, from drug testing protocol, changes in judging rules and the scoring system, and the new rounds system among other things. Lots of interesting stuff that is pretty much the genesis of modern-day UFC rules. I know I've mentioned this before but I don't usually cover the MMA news that is in every issue of the Observer. But I know there's a lot of crossover between wrestling and MMA fans so I'm sure a lot of MMA fans are reading these. From the very beginnings of the sport, Dave has covered it in detail just like he does wrestling. Not just UFC, but all the Japanese promotions too. Pancrase, RINGS, Pride, etc. So if you're an MMA fan with an interest in the behind-the-scenes news going on in the 90s, you really should go read this stuff, it's interesting even for me and I'm not an MMA fan.
Diablo Velasco passed away this week at 75. You probably haven't heard the name but he's the guy who trained some of the greatest legends in Lucha Libre, including El Santo, Blue Demon, Perro Aguayo, and dozens of others.
The ECW/TNN deal still hasn't officially been announced but it's pretty much a done deal. ECW will still run their syndicated shows, but none of the footage that airs on the TNN show can be used on the syndicated shows, which is going to really hurt those shows. ECW has to keep their syndication deals in place though, because if the TNN show doesn't work out or got cancelled, they'd be left without any television and that would kill the company. But don't expect a lot of storylines or angles to take place on the syndicated shows anymore, it'll almost all be done on the TNN show. Right now, ECW is just staying the course and not really doing any major storylines. The plan is to wait until the TNN show before doing any big angles and they may re-do some old successful angles with new wrestlers, since they figure the vast majority of the audience won't be that familiar with ECW's past.
Rob Van Dam has a small role in an upcoming episode of NBC teen series City Guys. The New York Post criticized NBC for it, pointing out that RVD is a known pot-head who advocates for marijuana in ECW and wears "420" merch and stuff like that and says he shouldn't be on a kids show. NBC execs are said to be upset about it, but the episode has already been filmed so hey, what can ya do? (Can't find any footage from the episode, but here's a pic from the set).

PHOTO: RVD on the set of City Guys

The guy last week who bid $11,999 for Tammy Sytch's old breast implants ended up not paying, so they're back up for auction. Check your local eBay.
Eric Bischoff hasn't attended a Thunder taping in weeks. Head booker Kevin Nash wasn't there for Thunder this week either. Just in case you were wondering how much the people in charge of WCW care about that show.
Insane Clown Posse claimed on their website that they're heading to WCW soon (yup).
A lot of people in the locker room were praising Ric Flair for putting over Buff Bagwell clean without complaint a couple of weeks ago. Basically, the locker room sees Flair as the only old guy there who is willing to put them over and try to help make them stars, while guys like Hogan, Savage, Piper, and Nash hold everybody else down and won't work with them.
Speaking of Nash, although he's technically the head booker of the company, he really only books his own programs and a couple of his friends. Dusty Rhodes and Kevin Sullivan are basically booking the rest of the company.
Shane Douglas is said to be close to starting with WCW. In a recent interview, Flair said he would never work an angle with Douglas (but of course he does). He also didn't seem thrilled about Sid Vicious being brought back, for obvious reasons.
Bischoff has tried to defend his decision to fire Davey Boy Smith, saying the paperwork was drawn up before they knew how bad Smith's medical condition was. Dave says that may be true, but it wasn't mailed until several days later and by then, everybody in the industry knew that Smith was fighting a life-threatening spinal infection, so Bischoff's "we didn't know" excuse doesn't really hold up.
Lou Thesz was interviewed about Owen Hart's death and basically criticized the state of the wrestling industry, saying, "I don't think I've ever felt as old or as out of touch as I do today." Thesz said that he stopped watching wrestling years ago but he has tried not to publicly criticize the business because he knows the wrestlers are just trying to make a living and give the crowds what they want. He then added, "I don't mean to be unkind, but I don't have to tell you about the audience. They're not too bright."
Harley Race was in the Kemper Arena the night Owen Hart died and says he was one of the last people to talk to Owen before he went up on the catwalk and had even joked with him beforehand, telling him to make sure the rope didn't break and that Owen laughed about it.
The plan to reveal Vince McMahon as the "Higher Power" was a last minute decision. They had hoped to have a major babyface turn heel for the role and had asked Mick Foley to do it, but he turned it down.
Due to Owen's death, the Over The Edge PPV seems to have pretty much been buried. When showing clips of Undertaker winning the title, they just say "On PPV Last month." Dave says he's willing to bet that next year's May PPV will be given a new name and there probably won't be anymore PPVs entitled "Over The Edge" (correct. And even though it was never released on home video, it was eventually made available on the Network).
WWF is looking to sell the hotel and casino that they bought in Las Vegas. They hope to use the money to buy a different piece of property in Vegas that would be more accommodating for what they want (a hotel/arena that they could run live wrestling shows out of).
All the letters are about Owen Hart, and this time some people are defending WWF's decision not to stop the show. He also disagrees with Dave saying that Steve Austin's beer tribute to Owen was contrived, saying there would have been a huge outcry if Austin had done nothing. Dave disagrees, saying that neither Vince or Undertaker spoke on the tribute show and there was no outcry. He also says Austin didn't go to Owen's funeral, even though he was heavily pressured to, but there was no outcry for that either. Dave says Austin's tribute to Owen was held until the very end of Raw as a ratings ploy, to keep fans tuned in throughout the entire show.

MONDAY: More on Sable's lawsuit and Nitro appearance, more on the Owen Hart lawsuit, Goldberg & Chris Jericho WCW contract news, and more...

Fallout: New Vegas is the worst sequel to any game I have ever played.

Fallout: New Vegas or Failout: No Wages as I like to call it, is the worst sequel to any game I have ever played and it is clearly inferior to both it's predecessor and it's successor. Bethesda made a mistake when they handed over the golden gem that is the Fallout series to this group of nobodies and here is why:
The first thing that is absolutely unequivocally awful about this game is the dialogue. What's the problem with it you may ask? Well there is clearly too much of it. It has tons and tons of dialogue with everyone as if you care about the characters or the world. If you're a tad bit curious because you're a friendless virgin with no life, you might want to know about the details of a fictional world and what goes on in it. Well this game is the game for you asshole because these NPC's literally never seem to shut up. Any question you might have about the world or setting it's possible that somewhere somehow one of these NPC's can accommodate you with an answer. Who needs answers when I want to shoot random things in a subway? As if having a bunch of dialogue and characters to talk to wasn't a chore enough it also gives you a bunch of needless dialogue options. Fallout 4 fixed that for us. Dialogue wheels are for real men, needing 80% medical knowledge to heal a wound is for sissies who want to "roleplay." Roleplay me being a dominant top and you being my subordinate bottom. You know the hole only gets deeper for these hacks, because like older RPG's they actually make it so that verbal encounters and roleplaying are more important than combat. They even made the mistake of giving you this option more often than they give you straight action encounters. Hey losers it's not 1997 anymore take your Infinity Engine game script back and give me some corridor action sequences followed by some one liners or get the hell out of this industry already.
Also it doesn't have a villain. What kind of shitty game doesn't have a preset villain to hate? I mean it does have characters and factions you can side with but you have to actually think about what they represent and what repercussions they would have on the Mojave/Vegas area. I cant hate on Obshitian entirely here because Bethesda made this same mistake with their mostly forgettable and crappiest game Morrowind, but that is beside the point. It also didn't keep the importance of Bethesda's brilliant black and white morality system instead opting for a faction based system that relied more on your relations to certain characters or groups rather than a vague idea of morality. Which sucks because how am I supposed to know whether I'm a good person or not if the game doesn't give me good or bad points? It gets even worse when the characters and factions come to represent complex themes and ideas. You know like capitalism vs socialism, corrupt-democracies vs militaristic dictatorships, Keynsian economics (Bulls and Bears), Hegelian historical determinism represented by the conflict of factions vs the freewill of the player to change things... Boring is what I have to say to all that. I mean it would be bad enough if we only had to deal with these things in the main quest and the major three factions but we have to see themes and loaded ideas even in the most minor of factions. Like the Boomers who are militaristic isolationists, The Followers doctors and scientists who are neutral to every other faction and try to help the less fortunate, and The Brotherhood of Steel who aren't the cool armor clad action stars they're in the Bethesda games in this game they're just paranoid hoarders of technology... Lameeeeeeeeeeeee, why would any person or group want to keep a technological advantage over others in an environment where resources are scarce and people are desperate and hence prone to be more dangerous? There aren't any cool factions like people who want ears and fingers for no reason or a merc company that seems to have endless funds and no reason to exist like my favorite group Talon Company. Give me a mission where a giant robot kills other robots for no reason and I get to shoot things. Bethesda knows how to make an action-sci-fi game not like these talent less hacks. The game setting is also a war in a desert over resources, between a corrupt but modern democracy and a slightly less technologically advanced foe who is more determined to win out of desperation and fanaticism and between them is an opportunistic businessman who is reaping the benefits of their mutual folly. Who has ever heard of such fictional nonsense taking place in real life? I almost have to compliment their imagination because clearly this could never take place in a world called Earth. They're all fighting not for bitches, money or to see my dad Liam Neeson like in my favorite game Fallout 3 but for a Dam... What is so important about a dam that gives you both water and electricity in a vast area? Fighting in the Mojave over resources almost makes me wish for a Bethesda Fallout game.

As a side note, in Mass Effect 3 you got these things called War Assets because you were fighting a war or at least that is what we were told. At the end of the game you didn't really see much of these war assets or their effect on the battle or even if they helped defend anything, but if my bros at Bioware said they were there I'm sure that they were. We were also told all our actions throughout the two previous games and the third installment would culminate into drastically different endings... Anyway, something truly stupid that Obsidian did was at the end of Fallout New Vegas and each of it's expansions they actually told you how your choices effected the world and what consequences your actions had. Some individual quests you did with minor factions could have broad sweeping consequences on the ending and even if you skipped the quests of certain factions or people it could mean their doom in the long run. Helping certain factions even though you also helped a seemingly unrelated faction might also effect things negatively or positively for that faction(s). It's like these tactless nerds actually cared how you effected the games world or something, what a bunch of losers. As if that wasn't enough unlike Bioware these absolute madmen actually took the time to show representatives and resources of the factions who you helped in the final battle of the game. Kind of pointless to add all that in if you ask me who would ever even notice they went through the effort to do that? I guess game journalists agreed with me, because they had my back on this one and they gave Mass Effect 3 the super high score that it deserved and gave Fallout: New Vegas a bad score to show people their disdain with such effort and attention to world building. Only entitled morons care about how their actions effect the world.

To top it all off, Those idiots at Obsidian went through the trouble of having people from the original Fallout games work on and write this one. Why not just get great minds like Todd "The Rod" Howard and Pete Hines to come up with great ideas like.... Ummmm, Super mutants that shouldn't exist on the east coast, or the Enclave which shouldn't quite exist to the extent that they do on the east coast or how about water that is radiated everywhere but an air craft carrier city which is already sensitive to rust can also endure decades of constant radiation you know with people living inside it all the while. With hardly any need for maintenance. Enough about Bethesda's brilliant decisions though, lets talk about the writers here. Tim Cain was the original creator of Fallout, he started working on Fallout 1 at Interplay as a side project that the executives at Interplay didn't have much faith in. They planned on cancelling it at least twice. In fact due to mismanagement Interplay had it's game division which would go on to make or have at least a part in the majority of games we now see as a PC RPG golden age in converted granary silos made to house the offices of Interplay staff while the company wasted the majority of it's money on other efforts like a console that never materialized and sports games no one remembers. The point is the whole Fallout franchise started as a passion project of one man in a dying company. Without Tim Cain there would be no Fallout anything. Tim Cain just so happens to work at Obsidian. So does Chris Avellone (no longer works there but did during NV), Feargus Urquhart, Darren Monahan, Chris Benson, Scott Everts, Brian Menze and my game making husbando Josh Sawyer. All of which worked at Interplay/Black Isle studios and had a part in Fallout 1, 2 or the proposed first sequel to those games "Van Buren." You might argue like me true blue Bethesd' bros that none of these has beens matter because Fallout 3 was clearly superior from a writing standpoint and I would agree of course. For the sake of argument though lets just consider that these people who worked on the original games just might have a slightly better handle on the themes and ideas therein. Just so we can truly show these Obsidiot's how wrong they are. I want to show them how wrong they're and who really go to the heart and spirit of the original fallout games. To test this lets analyze this games setting and themes a little bit more and another games later on.
We talked about some of the more boring aspects of the plot and setting, but lets talk about where those has beens really fucked up and I mean bad, the flavor details. The Fallout games have always drawn heavily from a sort of atomic-equivalent of steam-punk and cyber-punk. I personally like to call it atomic-punk but sometimes it's called diesel-punk by geeks with no life but it gives us an idea of what the Fallout universe at least in part aims to be like. I mean we also have the two original games and things like the first three Mad Max films which also alluded to real world conflicts over resources, the mirroring of post-apocalyptic factions as real world groups and big ideas and questions framed in a science-fiction/action setting. From my own personal reading and viewing experience I might also add things like 1950-60's science-fiction and horror and the overt love of atomic power in the writings of people in both fiction and real world documents. Completely boring and talent less writers like Isaac Asimov giving us a vision of an atomic future utopia that features as the backdrop placed over 1950's like era that was the precursor setting of the Fallout world before the bombs dropped. That shit is old and boring though who wants to play old games, read old books or watch old movies? Well if this lame ass game is any example apparently the people at Obsidian do because they tried to make New Vegas fit within the framework of all these influences and make sense within them. On top of all that shit I just laid out they also tried to make the game feel like a western and also capture some of the style and flair of historical Las Vegas. You might even say if you want to give them credit that they tried to work in the ideas of gambling, chance and luck into their bigger themes as stated in the paragraphs above. Giving the Vegas setting not just a small role as the location of the game but giving it a thematic importance within the framework of the broader story they were trying to tell. The city of Vegas, which we all know to be a boring setting. Who even likes people like the Rat Pack, Howard Hughes, the Mafia, old country music and the look and styling of old casinos? People who don't understand the beauty of rubble, that's who. Well if you do happen to like such nonsense, Obsidian seemed to go out of their way including all kinds of historic flavor details not just as part of the location or landmarks you visit but as core parts of the story. One of the first people you see before the game even starts is Benny in a cinematic. Benny is made to look and he is acted out like a real historical person named Benjamin "Bugsy" Siegel, A real life mafioso and figure of classic Hollywood who had a lot to do with Vegas becoming a resort town centered around "large" casinos as opposed to the small gas stop casinos that were there before. Benny is just the first character you see in the game but he is just the tip of iceberg when it comes to Vegas themed characters and historic references. House being the most important character I can think of in this vein. House is based on Howard Hughes in both look and personality, but well integrated into the story of Fallout with motives and wants all his own. That's all well and good Obsidiot's but, I don't care about people that are already dead, YAWN.

The supposedly "wild west" mostly existed as series of loose cities and territories that tried to impose local business owned government in lieu of the real thing due to historical circumstance and a young democracies lack of interest in the west until later in the century. You might say that the territory between the NCR's reverse manifest destiny eastward and the Legion's burgeoning Pax Romana reflects the same historical circumstance in an entirely different setting but with the people between the two states serving a similar function and having the same attitude of those in the wild west. The denizens of New Vegas in the smaller towns and areas are weary of both of the bigger super powers encroaching on their territory and want to be left alone. Much like the the romantic west they want to hold on to a fleeting lifestyle between the wars that they know will end but they're too attached to anyway to not want to keep. If you can take a hint and see past a few jokes you may have noticed earlier that I stated the circumstances of the game reflect the current circumstances of modern day times. Corrupt Democracies in the west face fanatical regimes in the Mideast in wars over resources while speculators and opportunists like Mr. House Reap all the benefits. Well while I do think that allegorical situation is their intended one, one can also say the circumstance between the warring factions reflect those of other conflicts like seeing things through the western setting, Cowboys and Indians. Obviously I don't mean that interpretation to be taken literally or even as the correct one, but merely to be seen as a possibility given the dense nature of the themes and the setting. This possible interpretation is reinforced slightly by an expansion Honest Hearts, but more on that later. Many of the quests and characters outside Vegas and one of the expansions I will talk about later are dedicated to the western themes and flavor the game tries to convey. That is to say it not merely tacked on to make you feel like a Clint-Eastwood style action star in the west. They thought about these themes what similarities they might have to the world they were creating and tried to lay them out accordingly. You may have asked yourself while playing this game why are there Roman cosplayers in my post-apocalyptic nuclear role playing game? The answer is easy when you consider the allegory above as New Vegas being a stand in for among other things middle eastern foibles. It was called the "Near East" in Roman times, but it ended their eastward expansion and caused problems that reverberated throughout the rest of the empire. Rome was a plunder and intimidate empire, their economy relied on plunder and constant expansion to keep the cash flow and resources needed to maintain its large size and relative prestige. This means that when they lost the various skirmishes in the mid east their options for plundering other states and empires large enough to be useful to them in terms of resource gain and wealth became rather short dooming the the economy to implode inward among a sea of other problems. What this all means in terms of the game is that NCR and Legion may seem different on the surface but their problems and faults mirror each other in certain historical lights and circumstances. The NCR's corrupt democracy is reminiscent of our own and the US's economy built on constant expansion is not just modeled on the Roman one of plundering resources at home and abroad but we also force countries to buy our products and use our currency. The US's empire also feels compelled to secure the middle east for resource gain and as a tactical fortress to further military excursions throughout other parts of the world. The point is the two factions are mirrored opposition empires who might fall due to a desert quagmire over resource distribution. All of this historical context is again used not just to make the game seem more "heady" but was actively used in constructing the world and characters the games constituent parts rely on. It would be one thing to add all this and just have them say this in large exposition dumps, but the makers of New Vegas found ways to merge it into as many areas of game play and setting as possible. They even gave the clothes in the game a western and Vegas feel. From Strip inspired suits to cattle rustler clothing. Because Obsidian seems to have a holistic design philosophy, building things from the setting outward even small or minor details seem to add to the games overall feel and themes. I can go and on about this or I can compare it to another game that, did things... Well, differently to say the least.

Interview with magician Lee Asher (President of 52 Plus Joker American Playing Card Collector Club)

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Ok It's Time for my...Annual *Pre-Burning Man Rant and Predictions!!

[Effortpost 6 of 15] Donald Trump's History of Bigotry

Pre-Presidency

2016 Candidacy

Presidency

OBLIGATORY FILLER MATERIAL – Just take a hard left at Daeseong-dong…5

Wrestling Observer Rewind ★ Jun. 21, 1999

Fallout: New Vegas is the worst sequel to any game I have ever played.

Interview with magician Lee Asher (President of 52 Plus Joker American Playing Card Collector Club)

Who is Lee Asher?

The Interview

Conclusion

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